2010-11 Player Review: The Numerous Exploits of Mario Balotelli

Mario Balotelli had quite the interesting year following his switch from Inter Milan to Manchester City over the summer. The troubled 20-year-old Italian never ceases to amaze with his on and off the field antics. Lets see what Super Mario was up to:

Aug. 13, 2010: Mario Balotelli signs for Manchester City. The transfer fee was £24m. The move represents a new start for the troubled young striker, whose year's at Inter were marred with controversy. A new chapter opens in the life of Super Mario.

Sept. 25, 2011: The 20-year-old gets pulled over by police with £25,000 cash in his car...when asked why he is carrying so much money, Balotelli responds: "Because I'm rich."

Oct. 2, 2010: Balotelli and his brother drive into a women's prison. Reports state the Balotelli brothers saw the gate open and never imagined they would need a permit to drive up to the front door. After being recognized, the officers let the two off. The police commented that both seemed to be particularly intrigued by the fact that it was a women's prison. Balotelli's reasoning for the breif visit: "I told my brother: 'Do you want to see a prison?' Then I went in."

Oct. 3, 2010: Super Mario returns to Italy and flips off supporters at a match between Inter and Juventus.

Dec. 21, 2010: Balotelli named best young player in Europe and expresses extreme confusion at who his second place adversary is:
"What's his name? Wil ... ? No, I don't know him, but the next time I play against Arsenal I will keep a close eye on him. Perhaps I can show him about the Golden Boy trophy and remind him that I won it."
His name is Jack Wilshere.

Jan. 18, 2011: Super Mario takes a dig at Manchester United's Wayne Rooney, claiming: "He [Rooney] is a very good player but not the best [striker] in Manchester."

Jan. 19, 2011: Cristiano Ronaldo, jealous that Mario commands the headlines, tells Balotell to "speak less and play more."

March 10, 2011: Blades of grass cause the young Italian to be withdrawn from City's first leg knockout match with Dynamo Kiev after 57 minutes. Allergic to grass as a footballer? You might be in the wrong profession, Mario.

March 17, 2011: Balotelli struggles to put on his training bib...for about two minutes:



March 17, 2011 cont'd: Edin Dzeko makes fun of Mario Balotelli's bib problem:

You know you are foolish when a tall, awkward, doofus is making fun of you and getting laughs out of it.

March 17, 2011 cont'd: With a bib on mind, Balotelli destroys Man City's European hope by getting a straight red in the 36th minute of the second leg knockout match against Kiev, after a chest-high lunge. How did Coach Roberto Mancini react? "He [Mancini] called me an idiot. He shouted that he wished he'd never signed me." Sick burn.

March 21, 2011: Mario admits to Italian national team coach Cesare Prandelli the he "needs help" because he always ruins everything, but cares about being in La Nazionale. Aww.

March 25, 2011: While dining in a posh city centre restaurant, Balotelli notices Wayne Rooney's alleged hooker...and says hi by yelling "ROONEY, ROONEY" across the restaurant, before approaching the woman and blowing a raspberry in the face of her companion.

March 27, 2011: Balotelli throws darts at Manchester City's Youth Team players through a first floor window at the club's training complex because he is "bored." Gotta do somethin' when you're bored!

April 6, 2011: The play-maker challenges several bouncers outside of a Manchester night club, continually goading and laughing at them, until one of them hit his Maserati repeatedly with a metal torch.

April 16, 2011: Following the club's crucial win over city rivals Man Utd in the FA Cup Semifinal, Balotelli raucously celebrates in a taunting manner in front of United's faithful.

April 20, 2011: Luck strikes Balotelli at a local casino, earning him a cool £25,000, of which he gives £1,000 to a homeless man outside on the street. 

April 25, 2011: The young Italian accrues parking fines of over £10,000 for having his car impounded over 27 times. Club staff report having to retrieve Balotelli's Maserati time and again out of the impound lot, as he will "drive from his luxury apartment to a restaurant a few streets away and leave the car on double yellows," for instance.

May 8, 2011: Balotelli retracts earlier statement about Rooney:

“When I was at Inter I saw Rooney and I didn’t think he was a really, really good player. But now I see Manchester United matches properly, I think he is one of the best."

May 9, 2011: After learning an autograph seeker is being bullied, Mario drives the young lad to his school and demands a meeting with the headteacher. After discovering the bullies identity, Balotelli makes the two shake hands.

May 14, 2011: Following City's FA Cup final victory, the ever-so-tactful striker curses on live TV:

May 23, 2011: Mario baffles club officials by requesting that pet dog Lucky, a black Labrador, join him atop Manchester City's celebratory bus during the FA Cup trophy parade.

May 23, 2011: Balotelli wins City's Young Player of the Year award, but fails to show up to the ceremony, forcing Micah Richards to awkwardly accept the award on his behalf.

May 24, 2011: Balotelli and Lucky skip Man City's FA Cup trophy parade.

Season Long: Over the year, Balotelli collected fines over £300,000 and had training ground bust ups with Carlos Tevez, Jerome Boateng, and Vincent Kompany.

This explains what Roberto Mancini has dealt with this season

I'm not even making this up! Mario Balotelli is hilarious. Is anyone else waiting to see this reality TV show? All in all, I would say the young Italian is just that: young. But lets hope he continues his ridiculous antics in the future.

Mario, I'm a fan.

Congratulations Are In Order

Congratulations to the city of Manchester: the city of champions!

Both Manchester teams won silverware on Saturday; Manchester United securing their record 19th English Premier League title and Manchester City lifting the FA Cup, their first trophy in 35 years. Even though these bitter city rivals despise one another, we can all agree two title triumphs on the same day in the same city is pretty sweet. Enough with the pundits who have written "United's Premier League title has marred City's victory." Give me a break! They are both basking in their trophies!

The cups:

Evra and Nani hoist the EPL balloon trophy replica - the real one will be presented at OT

Man City lift the coveted FA Cup

The player's ridiculous antics:

Rooney...oh Rooney

Tevez acting silly



Balotelli cursing on live TV after the game...gotta love him!

Kudos to the teams from Manchester and congrats to their fans.

Remember the FIFA '06 Videos?

This morning I heard a song that reminded me of some awesome unlockable video clips within FIFA '06 for Xbox. Being that I am on vacation this week, I decided to devote time to dig up all the vids and post them for all to enjoy:

Intro 

THIS IS OUR FAITH.


Top Ten Goals

A Barthez moment, Ligue 1 Ronaldinho scampering, and Becks from midfield. My favorite: Yeboah and his wonderful control.


Premier League Highlights

Remember Ruud?!


Italian Serie A Highlights

Oh Roma. Even a video game showed how pathetic you can be.


French Ligue 1 Highlights

French football = delightful dancing and finishing.


German Bundesliga Highlights

More delightful dancing infused with some heated arguments.

Man these videos bring me back. I would say my favorite League Highlight is the French Ligue 1. Stunning stuff going on over there in the mid 00s. Which one is your favorite?

English Excitement: A Stunning Weekend For Football

Pundits have called this week one for the ages in English football. At the beginning, we saw over £120 million spent on deadline day. Midweek, a few debutants showed up on the score sheet. And then, the weekend came...

We saw an insurmountable comeback, rivals square off, first lose to worst, some late winners, and a few hat tricks. All in all, there were 43 goals scored in 10 games. Best league in the world? You bet. This was an incredible weekend for football. Allow me to review some top highlights:

Arsenal lose a 4 goal lead...I mean Newcastle come back from 4 down

I am speechless. How in the world did Arsenal let this happen? I have not heard Arsene Wenger's post-match comments, but I'm sure he blamed the loss on something ridiculous: "The referee's kit color distracted my players." Please watch the video above and marvel at this incredible comeback, which was capped off by an unbelievable strike from 20 yards by Cheick Tioté.

Liverpool doubles up on the champions - Fernando who?

The highly anticipated match-up pitting the rivals against each other happened to be Fernando Torres' first game for Chelsea, after his sensational departure from Liverpool earlier in the week. The Reds didn't sweat it, though, dispatching of the Blues 1-0 through a well-taken Raul Meireles goal. Torres had a tepid game versus his cagey former club, resulting in an elbow to the face, a 65th minute withdrawal, and consequent "YOU SHOULD HAVE STAYED WITH A REAL CLUB" chant. Liverpool jump to 6th in the table and are now 6 points behind Chelsea and Tottenham for the final champions league spot. I just got tingles.

United they fall

Incredibly, the last-placed Wolves gave Manchester United their first loss of the campaign. Nani put the leaders ahead after just two minutes, but the resilient Wanderers fought back and held on for the win. I honestly didn't think United could lose this year.

Electrifying late goals

Tioté's equalizing screamer in the 87th minute was not the only late stunner this weekend. Nico Kranjcar (above) drilled a 30 yarder in the 92nd minute against Bolton to secure all 3 points for Tottenham and versatile defender Robert Huth struck twice in the dying moments to give Stoke a crucial victory over Sunderland. 

Hat-trick heroes

Man City's Carlos Tevez recorded a first half hat-trick and Everton striker Louis Saha struck a hat-trick plus one in a great win over Blackpool.

I'll admit, more than once I had three streams running on my laptop. It was extremely hard to choose one game to watch. The EPL keeps us wanting more and more. The words "best league in the world" don't really have to be said anymore, since it's pretty much established that the Prem is just that. 

Debutants Ball

As a fan, it feels good when a new signing scores in his debut. It almost makes one forget about the astronomical price tag of the modern player. It also brings hope to struggling teams and their faithful. In the Premier League last night, there were some very happy clubs and supporters beaming about their newest signings.

I present to you the debutants:

Luis Suarez Liverpool

Well...he rounded the keeper nicely!


Robbie Keane West Ham


Great take by Robbie (see 1m mark).


Daniel Sturridge Bolton


Nothing like a winner in added time on your home debut! Though Sturridge was gifted the goal, he stuck it home well (see end of highlight clip).

I Can't Help But Admire Manchester United

Sensible Soccer prides itself on being sensible (well, most of the time). That is why I must admit my admiration for Manchester United.

Many of you may loathe the perennial powerhouse, but we all know the truth: they are quite impressive. With no losses to date, United have a chance to complete a unique undefeated campaign. Despite a relatively flat summer transfer window, contractual problems with their ace, Wayne Rooney, and injuries to certain stars, the club has somehow maintained a stellar record. What is their recipe for success? Here's what I think:

Management

Sir Alex Ferguson

One thing is certain: Sir Alex Ferguson is the best manager in world football. I know, Jose Mourinho is slipping off your tongue right now, but no gaffer has done what Ferguson has, year in, year out, for 25 years with the same club. This year more than ever, we must tip our hat to the Scot. After suffering the blow of not topping the table last season and hardly spending in the summer, Ferguson has still guided his team to the top spot in the league, where they sit two points in front of rivals Manchester City, with an astonishing two games in hand. I find Sir Alex's understanding of the squad's strengths and weaknesses unheralded, as he exhibits his grip on the lineup on a weekly basis. This is a man who knows how to get the best out of his team and win under any circumstances.

Defending 
Even as Rio Ferdinand and John O'Shea's fitness problems persist, United's defense continues to perform remarkably well. They currently have the second lowest goals against in the Premier League and only conceded once during group play in the Champions League. I largely credit their success to the man-machine, Nemanja Vidic. The Serb has certainly hit back at any detractors claiming a dip in form after last year's campaign. In addition, Patrice Evra (even though I loathe his attitude) has been solid as ever.

Perseverance

Javier Hernandez's late winner vs. Stoke

Whether it be a fluky Nani winner or a late Vidic header to preserve a draw, United always get the goal they need. Time and again this season the Red Devils have pulled points out of the jaws of defeat. A two goal cushion is like sitting on a wooden stool against this team -- just ask Villa. The club has amazingly scored eight goals after the 80th minute, four of which were winners. Their position in the table can surely be attributed to these extra point-earning efforts late in matches.

Balance
The team seems quite balanced in it's goal scoring and distribution. Once upon a time, Rooney and Ronaldo needed to do most of the dirty work, but as of late, the wealth has been spread. Dimitar Berbatov is finally having the year he's being paid to have, with 14 goals in Premier League play. Nani is truly coming into his own as a player, proving to be a constant threat on the wing and in front of goal. In addition, a gusty set of goals by youngster Chicarito has earned the team vital points, and most recently, the unsung hero of Old Trafford, Park Ji-Sung, has worked his socks off to bag a few crucial ones for the team. Though Rooney lags behind the others in goal tally, he has turned provider, assisting seven times this year.

The delightful Park Ji-Sung celebrates after dispatching Arsenal

Consistency
As Chelsea, Arsenal, and Manchester City continue to drop points, the Red Devils remain steadfast in their resolve. The rest of the top four are gifting United this title by losing or drawing against inferior opposition. If Man United continues to secure points regularly, they will be champions.

In years past, I have despised Manchester United, much like many of you. But this campaign, I can truly admit I am impressed by their workmanlike effort and team unity. I love when teams work hard and get the job done -- and this is Manchester United in 2010/2011.  Also, it helps that everyone's favorite babyman, Cristano Ronaldo, has moved on to greener pastures, annoying fans who speak another language. That said, I urge you to take a closer look at this team and try to tell yourself 'they are not worthy.' In any event, who in their right mind wants to see Chelsea win hardware again?

A very special Sensible Soccer thanks goes out to my brother for helping out with the blog's new design. It got 100 times better with Landon sliding in, didn't it?